The Eleventh Doctor's final Christmas
by Planet of the Deaf
Summary: It's Christmas 2013, and the Doctor and Clara are preparing for the festivities. Then things take a turn for the worse. Can the Doctor save the day and save himself?
1. Preparing for Christmas

**With the sad news that Matt Smith has filmed his final scenes as the Doctor, this is my take on his final episode this Christmas. It starts with the well publicised, but very slightly spoilerish 'turkey' scenes but then veers off in a different direction. This first chapter is quite fluffy, with hints of whouffle, but the story will get darker, and the end will inevitably be sad, but hopefully a bit uplifting as well, as Eleven and Clara face their final moments together. All characters belong to the BBC, I've just borrowed them for a bit :-)**

* * *

"No, no, no!" the Doctor exclaimed. "We are not cooking a turkey in the TARDIS"

"But why not?" replied Clara.

"Surely it would be better cooking it in the flat?"

The Doctor had made available to Clara, Rose's old flat, though as she was now travelling with the Doctor on a semi-permanent basis, and still helping out the Maitlands from time to time, she rarely stayed there.

"Doctor, I'm very grateful for the flat, but it doesn't feel like home. My home. Our home. There are too many ghosts there, I feel like I'm intruding into somebody else's house. This is the first Christmas when I've been away from home, and I want it to be special."

"So, why aren't you going back to your father's this year"

"He's gone away on a cruise this Christmas, hoping to meet a rich widow I think! He seemed to think I'd want to spend Christmas here this year anyway, with my, in his words, Doctor boyfriend."

"Fine, but you're not cooking the turkey in here!"

"You're worried about the TARDIS aren't you?"

"Well, to be fair, after your last disastrous attempt to make a soufflé, and resulting fire, the TARDIS was so put out she hid the kitchen for two days. Two whole days! Most inconvenient, I couldn't even boil an egg."

"Who's in charge here, you or the TARDIS?"

"An interesting question, one I've never really managed to definitely answer. On the one hand, I am…"

"Well it's up to you" Clara interrupted, "either I cook Christmas dinner here or not at all. I'm sure you'll enjoy your beans on toast alone in the TARDIS!"

And with that Clara stormed out of the TARDIS, followed by the Doctor.

"Stop!" cried out the Doctor "ok you win, you can cook the turkey in the TARDIS"

"Oh, thank you!" Clara beamed in delight as she ran to hug the Doctor, something that wasn't unpleasant he had to admit, and probably worth the hassle the TARDIS would give him. Clara was looking particularly cute today, he pondered, with a very stylish cardigan with bow ties on, which surely wasn't an accident, and quite a tight skirt on that definitely suited her, and…

"Have you ever cooked a turkey before?" asked Clara, interrupting his thoughts "My father always cooks it at home, he's a surprisingly good cook in fact, my main role is peeling the vegetables."

"No, but I've cooked chicken before, and it can't be much different. I make a mean stuffing too! I'm sure we can work it out between us. Hopefully"

"Ok, I'll leave the stuffing to you. As look as it doesn't contain fish fingers and custard! I'll go and collect it now from the flat, it's in the fridge. You can put the Christmas decorations up if you like."

While Clara was away, the Doctor wondered where he had put the Christmas decorations. He went to the room where he thought they were kept, and they weren't there. To be more precise, the room wasn't there.

"Have you hidden the room?" he asked the TARDIS. "I know you're not happy about Clara cooking in here, but that's something you'll just have to live with. Now put back the room with the decorations please."

The TARDIS made a grumbling noise, but gave in to the Doctor's request. The Doctor entered the room and retrieved a large trunk full of assorted decorations, which he had accumulated over the years, and carried it with some difficulty back to the console room. Looking out of the window he saw Clara in the distance, struggling with a large turkey in a baking tray. Sensing she needed a hand, he strode across the grass to help her.

"Do you need a hand?"

"No, I'm fine" but the tone of her voice gave away the struggle she was having with the large bird. The Doctor moved behind her, and gently managed to take hold of both Clara's hands and the baking tray. It was a surprisingly intimate moment, considering they were holding a large turkey in a field.

"Thank you Doctor. It was getting a bit heavy." The Doctor's grip was very reassuring, and not just in preventing the bird from falling. Clara felt safe with him near. She also felt other feelings about the Doctor, but pushed them to one side. Don't be silly, he's a 1000 year old Timelord, and you're a 20 something human. Why would he be interested in you, humans come and go in his life, you're just the girl currently lucky enough to be able to travel with him.

The two of them walked together across the field towards the TARDIS, and eventually found the fridge to put the turkey in. Though not in the kitchen where it had previously resided; presumably the TARDIS felt that this distant corridor was a more appropriate place for it.

Back in the control room, the Doctor pointed out the box of decorations to Clara.

"What do you think? Every version of me has added to this collection, there's decorations from across every known universe, from every single point in time, some of the most exotic and dazzling things you will ever see"

"Do you have tinsel?"

"Do I have tinsel! I've got Zingarian active tinsel, which changes shape and colour when you look at it, I have Garalutian baubles, which hover in the air and spray magic dust over you, I have…"

"Sounds great" interrupted Clara. Go get a step ladder, I'll let you put them up, I wouldn't know what to do with them. And be careful, I don't want the fall of the eleventh to be you falling from a ladder!"

"Yes dear" the Doctor sighed.

"Oh, and what are you giving Artie and Angie for Christmas, they'll be expecting something special from you?"

"I don't give presents. I give experiences!"

"I was afraid you'd say that" replied Clara with a touch of concern in her voice.

"Well tomorrow is Christmas Eve, and what could be better than a trip to Victorian London to experience the true wonder of Christmas. We can pop in to see Vastra and the gang too."

"And it'll definitely be safe."

"Of course."

"That's what you said last time."

"Well, this time will be different, lightning doesn't strike twice."

"It usually does when you're around."

* * *

Several hours later, and after only a couple of small accidents with the stepladder, from which the Doctor emerged with only broken pride, and Clara learned a few Gallifreyan expletives the TARDIS was decorated. It did look amazing, Clara had to admit.

"That looks awesome Doctor, Angie and Artie will love it."

"I hope so, though you can never be sure with those two. What have you been doing in the kitchen?"

"Making a Christmas pudding."

"I love Christmas pudding, I hope you remembered to hide some coins in it, it's always exciting when you find the sixpence, well two pounds these days with inflation. I love pouring the brandy on top and lighting it, just don't use Yugofraxian brandy as it's rather explosive, blew Tegan right across the room!"

"Um, no, er no coins yet, there was a slight problem with the mix. I don't understand what went wrong, but don't worry, I'll clean the mess up. I will need to borrow the stepladder though."

"The stepladder?"

"Don't ask. You may wish to be nice to the TARDIS though. I think she's a bit upset with me. Probably best if I buy a pudding from the supermarket tomorrow. I can't seem to find the Brussels sprouts either. Any idea where they've gone, as I only put them in the fridge a couple of hours ago?"

"Maybe the TARDIS moved them, you know how she is. I'm sure we can live without sprouts, there are plenty of other vegetables you know!" the Doctor replied brightly.

"Are you _sure_ you don't know where they've gone? It looks like I'll have to buy some more tomorrow. You can't have Christmas Dinner without sprouts."

The Doctor looked less than enthusiastic...

* * *

The next day, the Doctor and Clara appeared outside the Maitland house.

"Angie, Artie, for Christmas this year, I'm taking you on another adventure" beamed the Doctor.

"Where are we off to?" replied an excited Artie

"Victorian London, you'll love it there, London looks lovely in the snow, and you can meet my friends Vastra, Jenny and Strax. Strax looks like a potato, but he's quite sweet really. Well for a Sontaran anyway. And no nasty surprises either, just festive fun. And you'll be back in time for tea, my promise."

"Why back so soon?" asked Angie

"You'll need time to hang your stockings up, while I'll be busy back in the TARDIS stuffing the bird."

Noticing the sniggers from Angie, Clara quickly interjected "The Doctor will be stuffing the turkey." And glared at Angie, which made her snigger a bit more.

"I'm sure that not the only thing the Doctor will be filling tonight!"

"Angie!"

"Right!" exclaimed the Doctor, thankfully for Clara bringing this particular conversation to an end. "Time to go. I've decorated the TARDIS for Christmas, I think you'll like it."

* * *

**All comments welcome, my previous attempt _I don't want to go_ was deleted by the administrators here, for reasons I'm not entirely sure about, hopefully the same won't happen again!**


	2. Angie and Artie

**Chapter 2, in which the Doctor takes Angie and Artie to visit Victorian London. If he can get them away from modern day London.**

**A touch of Whouffle, annoying children and a bit of a cliffhanger to end the chapter...**

* * *

"Do we have to go now?" moaned Angie, "Debbie has just sent me a link to this cool new One Direction video, where they're all dressed up with reindeer antler hats on, and Harry apparently says something very funny, and then Liam falls over, and…"

"And I was playing this really good game on Facebook against Marvin" interrupted Artie "and I'm 3-1 up, and I'm so completely winning."

"One Direction are just, so amazing and cool and wonderful and brill, can't we go and see them instead" continued Angie "So much better than Justin Bieber, he's such a saddo."

"I'll see what I can do in the future" replied a slightly irritated Doctor. "15 minutes then. We'll be in the TARDIS."

"And no more delays" added Clara, "It'll be brilliant, I promise you!"

The Doctor and Clara walked over to the TARDIS which was parked outside the Maitland's house. As the TARDIS's doors shut behind them, Clara turned to the Doctor.

"So what year are we going to?"

"1893. Christmas Eve 1893"

"Any particular reason for that year?"

"Why not, I think it was a good year, Vastra and the gang were still in London and you, I mean the other Clara, was um, er, nothing."

"You mean the Victorian version of me, the one that saved you from the Great Intelligence? Are we going to meet her?"

"No, she died in 1892, I didn't think it would be a good idea for you to meet another version of yourself, the paradox might be dangerous, meeting an identical but different version of yourself, and I've no idea of the consequences."

"Was she nice, this Victorian version of myself?"

"Why, um, do you ask?"

"Well, when you appeared at my door you seemed very pleased to see me, even if you did come across as this weirdo Monk! I guess you must have liked the Victorian version of me."

"Yes, she was, er nice" the Doctor replied carefully.

"Only nice?" replied Clara with a smile. "What was she like then, did she look like me, talk like me?"

"Yes, she looked just like you, though obviously she dressed differently. She also spoke with a Cockney accent. She was you, though not 100% identical. I guess each version of you has slight variations in personality that arise from their circumstances."

"Did you prefer her to me?"

"Well I didn't get to know her for very long, I, er think, um no I am fairly sure, no positive, 100% positive, I definitely prefer you to the other one" the Doctor squirmed.

"Right answer chin boy" Clara replied with a smirk on her face "but this other Clara clearly made a strong impression on you, _even_ if you didn't like her as much as you like me. Actually, it's a bit weird being competitive with another version of yourself. I think I'd like to meet her, imagine two Claras travelling with you!"

"That is certainly an interesting thought. Not sure what the TARDIS would say, mind you."

"Did she kiss you?"

"Sorry?"

"The other Clara made a big impression on you, so did she kiss you? Just wondering…"

"I don't remember" the Doctor mumbled awkwardly.

"Oh, she _did_ kiss you then! Hmm, I can't let other versions of me have all the fun."

Clara turned towards the startled Doctor, rested her hands on his shoulders, moved her face towards him, then…

Blam, blam blam!

"Oh, is that the door!" cried out the Doctor, "It'll be Artie and Angie, mustn't keep them waiting" as he ran over to let them in, leaving a disappointed, but thoughtful Clara behind.

"Come in, come in, what do you think?" beamed the Doctor.

"One Direction are so dreamy, that was a really cool video. I think Niall is my favourite now, Emma prefers Harry, and Anita is _so_ into Zayn it's unbelievable, but Niall is my one. He's different from the rest…"

"Angie" interrupted Clara "The Doctor was referring to the TARDIS. What do you think of the decorations?"

"They're alright I suppose" replied Angie, briefly looking around.

"Alright?" exclaimed an exasperated Doctor "Zingarian active tinsel, Garalutian magic dust baubles, a tree from the ancient forests of Dudulactory. Alright?"

"Yeah, whatever, they're not bad I mean."

"I think they're amazing" added Artie "thank you Clara's boyfriend."

"I'm glad someone appreciates them" replied Clara "shall we go now?"

"1893, here we come" cried out the Doctor, regaining his bounce, as he powered up the TARDIS. A few seconds later it landed.

"Oh, that's funny, Christmas Eve 1894. Oh well, I'm sure that's not a major thing, perhaps 1894 was a better Christmas."

"Your stupid machine got us to the wrong year" moaned Angie.

"More Wrong Direction than One Direction!" added Artie with a grin.

"Very droll" mumbled the Doctor though gritted teeth, before exclaiming "Time to go and meet Vastra and the gang!"

"Artie" called out Clara "put that bauble back, you're spraying the dust stuff everywhere."

"Yes Clara"

The four of them exited the TARDIS. It was a beautiful, snowy scene outside, with shoppers scurrying around buying final presents, and carol singers celebrating the festive season. Angie seemed more concerned about the lack of mobile phone signal though.

"This is so unfair, what if Niall was to call me now, and I can't answer it, and he instead calls Debbie and asks her out instead, and oh my life would be at an end if that happened, and I'd have to, like kill myself, and it would be your fault for taking me to this stupid place."

Thankfully for the Doctor and Clara they soon arrived at Vastra's.

"Welcome Doctor, always good to see you again. Hello Clara, these must be the children you look after."

"Yes. Angie and Artie, this is Madam Vastra, and with her is her wife Jenny. They are friends of the Doctor. Vastra is a Silurian, an ancient lizard race. Jenny, um isn't."

"Pleased to meet you" Jenny added cheerfully

"So you two are married? That's cool" replied Angie. "I'm going to marry Niall from One Direction; I know he's waiting for me."

"That's nice dear" replied Jenny pleasantly, hiding her confusion well.

"And this is Strax" continued Vastra. "He's a Sontaran."

"And yes" interrupted the Doctor "He does look like a potato. But he's more intelligent than a potato. Well on a good day. Sontarans are a mighty warrior race, great when the chips are down. Ha, ha that's a good one, potato, chips… oh never mind." The Doctor looked disappointed at the lack of response to his 'joke'.

"Right, we'll fix up some refreshments for the children then" continued Vastra. "Jenny makes very nice Ginger Beer, we'll be in the pantry." And with that Angie and Artie exited with Vastra and Jenny, leaving Strax alone with the Doctor and Clara.

"Those children" said Strax in a lowered voice, "I've been keeping my eye on them, and between you and me sir, I believe them to be enemy agents, who can't be trusted and must be destroyed! Permission to get the limpet mines and laser monkeys ready."

"Oh please…" replied a fed up Doctor

Clara glared at him, then punched him in the arm for good measure.

"Ow, no I mean, Oh please, um spend some time with them, you'll find they're really, um nice, and not at all a danger" continued the Doctor weakly, who was beginning to wonder if a quiet day rewiring the TARDIS console might have been more enjoyable. And less painful, as he rubbed the bruise on his arm.

His gloom was then suddenly interrupted by a scream, and a cry of "Doctor, Strax, quick!" The Doctor, Clara and Strax rushed towards the pantry, where the cry had come from.

"It's Artie. He's collapsed!"

* * *

**All comments welcome. the next chapter will be a bit darker I suspect...**


	3. A cure?

**A different tone to this chapter as things get more serious. Can the Doctor find a cure for Artie? Oh, and another cliffhanger at the end...**

* * *

The Doctor entered the room followed by Strax and Clara. They saw Artie out cold on the floor, and a distraught Angie being comforted by Jenny. Clara rushed over to Artie.

Strax had picked up his medical equipment on the way in, and gave Artie a scan with it. "He's collapsed sir, there seems to be some sort of poison in his bloodstream. I've stabilised him so he can't get worse, but I don't think I can eradicate the poison. It's not normal human poison."

"What's going on Doctor?" called out a distraught Clara "You promised me they'd be safe, and it's happened again. Why did I trust you? Please tell me you can cure Artie."

"I don't understand what's happened" cried out the Doctor. "This wasn't meant to happen; we haven't done anything risky, or gone anywhere exotic. I made sure, I was 100% sure that there was so danger, but oh god…" he tailed off.

"Doctor!" interrupted Clara "we were meant to go to 1893 but the TARDIS took us to 1894. You don't think we were taken to this year for a reason, maybe by an outside force or something?"

"I don't know. Vastra, can you think of a reason why the TARDIS didn't take us to 1893?"

"I can't think of anything" replied Vastra "but ah, hold on. Christmas Eve 1893 was a horrible day wasn't it Jenny?"

"Oh, yes I remember it well, driving rain and howling gales, the Christmas Tree outside St Barnaby's blew down didn't it, almost crushed poor Mrs Black. Not like today, which is a beautiful day outside."

"So the TARDIS brought us here in 1894 because she wanted us to have a better day…" replied the Doctor. A pause followed when everyone considered the implications.

"Strax, can you identify the poison?"

"I can isolate the chemical compound sir."

"Excellent, by analysing it in the TARDIS I should be able to find out what it is and where it comes from. It's the best chance of finding a cure."

"Give me five minutes sir."

Strax pressed a few more buttons on his scanner, which then produced a printout. "Here you are sir, this is the compound".

"Thank you, thank you. I'll be right back." And with that the Doctor rushed out.

"Don't worry Angie" said Jenny in a soothing voice "I'm sure the Doctor can find a cure, he always does. He brought me back to life, without him I wouldn't be here now."

"Are you sure?" snuffled a tearful Angie.

"Positive".

"Thanks" mouthed Clara gratefully to Jenny, though she wished she was feeling that confident herself. She knew travelling with the Doctor was risky, and was prepared to take risks to her own safety for the joy and wonder of travelling with the Doctor. Indeed she had jumped into his timestream to save him, knowing full well that she probably wouldn't come back alive. But not the children's safety. They had their own lives to live, their own choices to make. She could never live with herself if they came to harm, if Artie, oh god no, if Artie died, and with that tears welled up inside her, and she rushed out of the room so that Angie wouldn't see her break down.

After what seemed like an eternity the Doctor returned.

"I now know where the poison comes from, but still don't understand how it came to be here. It's from the planet Garalutia, but what's it doing in Victorian London? What brought it here?"

Then suddenly it hit him.

"Oh my god, NO!" and he buried his head in his hands in anguish.

"What is it Doctor? What's wrong?" cried out Clara who had returned to the pantry after regaining her composure.

"It's the Garalutian baubles, the ones I decorated the TARDIS with; maybe they weren't Christmas decorations at all, but a means of somehow showering deadly poison. The rest of us must have got a mild dose, but Artie, Artie he had played with one, and must have got a massive dose of what I thought was magic dust. Oh god. And it's all my fault. Why do I keep doing it, putting people at risk like this? Maybe I've outlived my purpose, maybe I'm now too much of a danger to this planet, and should go somewhere else where I can't put innocent people in terrible danger. A mad man in a box, too mad…" And with that the deflated Doctor petered out, a broken man.

"But Doctor" replied Vastra "what about the millions of people you've saved, the galaxies and solar systems that wouldn't be here without you. You can't give up now. Remember how you thought you had lost Clara last Christmas, but she came back. I know you'll find a cure for this poison, you have to trust yourself."

"You can do it Doctor" added Clara, "you never give up, you never turn your back when someone needs your help. You will save Artie, I know it."

"Thank you" replied the Doctor, regaining his composure. "I need to travel to Garalutia to try and find the cure for Artie. Stay behind Clara, you're too important to risk."

"I can't let you travel by yourself. I'm coming with you."

"But Clara…"

"No buts, I'm coming with you."

"We'll look after Angie, she'll be fine here" added Vastra.

"Well ok then. Thank you. We need to be quick, I don't know how long Strax can keep him stable. Oh and one more thing Strax, can you scan the rest of us to see if we're also infected."

"Right away sir." Strax scanned everyone in the room. "You're all fine."

"Great, thanks."

And with that the Doctor and Clara hurried back to the TARDIS.

"I need to clear out any of the remaining dust from the baubles before we go in, so am going to activate the TARDIS air extractors first. I won't expel the contaminated air outside yet, there's plenty of space in the TARDIS waste tanks to keep it until I find somewhere safer to expel it. I will then go in and remove the baubles and also keep them in a safe place; they're probably safe in small doses, as neither of us seem to be affected, but will put on my orange protective suit on first. Should only take a few minutes."

A few minutes later the Doctor called Clara in.

"Right, off to see the Emir of Garalutia now. We go back a long way."

* * *

They landed in Garalutia.

"You'll love this place, a shame we couldn't be visiting here in happier circumstances. His palace is the tall green building."

The Doctor and Clara entered the building, and were directed along a long corridor with portraits along the wall.

"These are the former Emirs" whispered the Doctor "the current one is a descendant of a long and noble line, he's been in power for 150 years now."

"150 years?"

"They are a long lived race. Here we are; the red door we were directed to."

The Doctor knocked on the door and they entered.

"Emir, it is an honour to see you again. It's the Doctor, you may not recognise me, as I had a different face the last time we last met.

"Doctor, this is a pleasant surprise" replied the Emir "do come in. And who is your young lady friend? You always keep such delightful company."

"Emir, this is Clara. I have indeed been very lucky with my human companions."

"Clara, a pleasure to meet you. And to what do I owe this visit? I hope Garalutia isn't under threat again?"

"No, Emir, but I need some urgent information. What do you know about Garalutian baubles? They float around, spraying out dust, which seems to contain a poison."

"Gosh, that's going back a bit Doctor. They're something my ancestors created thousands of years ago, we were under threat from a rival planet at the time, Arbrantia I believe. The idea was that these baubles would be sent to their leaders, to kill them with their poison dust. A lousy idea as it happened, they just floated around and everyone ignored them after a while; at small doses the body can easily defeat the poison. You'd need to physically shake them and breathe in a lot of dust for the poison to have any effect, and only a few innocent children did this and were killed; once in the body at a certain level the poison rapidly grows until the body can't resist it any more. Luckily all the remaining baubles were destroyed years ago."

The Doctor and Clara exchanged fearful glances.

"Sadly not Emir. I don't know where I got them from, but somehow I thought that they would make nice decorations, I thought they were perfectly safe. I had no idea! A child I had with me, he handled one of them and breathed in the dust, all my fault, and collapsed. He's being kept in a stable condition at the moment, and I desperately need a cure."

"Doctor, there is a cure that will make him better again, but it might not be what you were hoping for. The poison is an intelligent poison, not something that can be eradicated from the body through conventional means. My physician can provide you with the cure, but it won't solve all your problems. He's over in the blue building across the yard."

"Thank you Emir, you've been really useful."

"Until the next time Doctor and Clara, farewell, and good luck."

The Doctor and Clara walked across the yard to where the Physician was based.

"Wait outside Clara, I think it better if I see him alone."

Clara was puzzled by this, but didn't protest. A few minutes later the Doctor emerged.

"I have the cure". But somehow the Doctor didn't seem as happy as Clara would have expected. "We must get back to Artie straight away."

They ran back to the TARDIS and flew back to Vastra's.

* * *

"Strax, how is Artie doing?"

"He's stable Doctor. Do you have news, do you have medicine or a remedy?"

"I have a cure which will make Artie better". And with that the Doctor kneeled over Artie and touched his face with both hands. Minutes later, Artie's eyes started opening, and life came back into his body.

"Artie, how are you feeling?" cried Clara

"Ok I think, what happened?"

"You were ill, but you seem to be better now."

Strax got his scanner out and checked Artie out.

"It's unbelievable, he's completely cured."

"Doctor you did it!" exclaimed Clara as she ran over to hug him. "Angie, Artie's going to be fine."

Angie ran over to hug Artie. She said nothing, but nothing needed to be said.

"I think we need to be making a move now," said the Doctor "quite enough excitement for one afternoon. Artie and Angie have Christmas to prepare for, and all their presents to look forward to."

"I've got Artie back" replied Angie. "That's the only present I need."

"Thanks for everything gang; I don't know what I'd do without you."

"Anytime Doctor" replied Vastra. "And don't forget, the world still needs you."

* * *

They returned to the TARDIS and flew back to modern day London.

"Home sweet home" exclaimed the Doctor. "And have a wonderful Christmas, you two."

"Why don't you stay for a bit?" asked Angie. "We've plenty of mince pies and sherry in the cupboard."

"Things to do, and I'm sure you've got stuff to do as well. Probably another One Direction video to watch."

"Oh them, whatever. Well if you won't stay, Merry Christmas Doctor and Clara!"

"Merry Christmas Clara and Clara's boyfriend."

"Merry Christmas Angie, Merry Christmas Artie!"

The Doctor and Clara returned to the TARDIS.

"You seemed very eager to get back to the TARDIS Doctor. Any particular reason?"

"Clara, we needed to be alone as I've got something to say to you. It's something I have to say now, I can't hold back any longer."

Clara turned to the Doctor, her heart in her mouth. What was the Doctor about to say, could the Doctor finally be about to reveal his feelings about her, could this be the time when… oh surely not, he'd rather die than say it. Assuming that he felt that way anyway which he probably didn't. Yeah, she was imaging it. But no, he had something to say, so perhaps it was what she hoped for.

"Clara, this is really difficult to say, something I never thought I'd say to you, but, but"

"Go on Doctor. Say what you feel, I won't be angry, I might be happy even."

"Clara". The Doctor took hold of Clara's hands and gazed into her brown eyes. Clara gazed back, oh how she had waited for this moment to come.

"Doctor"

"I'm about to regenerate."

* * *

**All comments welcome. The next chapter will probably be the last one, unless I split it. I suspect it will be emotional...**


	4. The truth

**No, not the last chapter yet, as I split the ending. In this chapter we find out why the Doctor has to regenerate, and a few other things...**

* * *

"You're about to regenerate?" Clara cried out in horror as she let go of the Doctor's hands. "Please tell me this is one of your silly little jokes, as if it is, it isn't funny and…" she tailed off as she saw the Doctor shake his head.

"Oh Clara, I wish it wasn't true, but it is, my time is nearly done."

"But, but you look fine, w-what happened?" stammered Clara, whose emotions were now all over the place.

"The Garalutian poison is working its way thought my body. At the moment I may appear ok, and indeed I will survive much longer than a human could, but it's only a matter of time. By regenerating, I can eradicate the poison and come back afresh."

"I don't understand" whimpered Clara, tears starting to fall down her cheeks.

"When the Emir of Garalutia told me that there was a cure for Artie, and that it wasn't what I was hoping for, I suspected what it might be, which is why I went to the physician alone. The poison is an intelligent poison for which there is no antidote or medicine, but it can be made to transfer from one person to another. The physician gave me a pill which made me, in simple terms, incredibly attractive to the poison, thus when I touched Artie, all the poison left his body and entered mine, saving his life. It was the only way to cure him, I can't now be cured, but I can regenerate, which will eradicate the poison from my body."

"Oh Doctor, why didn't you tell me this beforehand? When we were in Garalutia?"

"It was better that you didn't know, that everyone in the room was happy when Artie was cured, I didn't want to ruin Christmas, especially for Angie and Artie."

"But I could have kept it secret."

"Could you? Knowing what had really happened to the poison?"

"Maybe."

"More importantly, it was entirely my fault, therefore it would have been unfair to involve anyone else in this solution. If you stopped me taking the pill, Artie would have died. If you agreed that I should take the pill, then this version of me would die instead. I couldn't let you bear any of the guilt of either of those alternatives, the thoughts throughout your life that you made the wrong decision, that you did the wrong thing, I love you too much for that."

"Doctor?" Clara held the Doctor's hands again.

"I have loved you since I first met Victorian Clara, since she brought me back from my cloud, and that first kiss. I was obsessed with finding you again, and then I found you, and you were beautiful and funny and perfect in every way. I've tried to resist, to pretend that I didn't love you, as it always hurts too much in the end. But, oh god it's been hard. I'm so happy when I'm with you, I sometimes wish I was a normal human and we could live a normal life together, loving each other and growing old together, but I know it could never be like that."

"Oh Doctor, I've loved you for so long, and always wondered whether you felt the same about me, or whether that was wishful thinking. I said to myself that it would never work, and yet, and yet I couldn't let go of those thoughts. When Mr Clever told me about your feelings for me, I so hoped it was you and not him saying it, but I knew you'd rather die than say it…Oh, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean it to come out like that."

The Doctor stroked Clara on the cheek, wiping away a tear.

"Shush."

And they kissed. They kissed for the longing that had been in their hearts for so long, the extraordinary feeling of togetherness that existed now, and… for the future days that they might never have with each other.

"Clara. When I regenerate, I will need you so much. I don't know what I'll be like, whether my feelings for you will be exactly the same, or indeed if your feelings for me will change, but you have my word, I'll still need you with me. You, of all my companions, have been with me throughout my life; you've seen and saved all the different versions of me. It's been an honour and a pleasure to have known you, my impossible girl."

"Doctor" whispered a tearful Clara. "How long have you got before the poison takes over, before you have to regenerate? How long have we got together?"

"I can probably last another day. Let's make it a good one eh."

And with that they kissed again.

* * *

The next morning Clara woke up with a strange feeling of excitement and dread. The bed felt so empty and cold as she stretched out. Something was wrong and unfamiliar, and then she remembered. She was in the Doctor's bed.

"Ah, you've woken up at last" cried the Doctor as he bounded in. I don't sleep much, so have been up for hours. And for someone so small, you don't half take up a lot of the space in bed!"

"I do not!"

"You kick as well. Probably deserved I suppose, but even then, ow!"

"You're such a big baby" laughed Clara as she threw a pillow at him.

"Anyway, time to get up. It's Christmas Day and we've got a turkey to cook!"

* * *

**So Clara and the Doctor _finally_ kiss - I'll let you imagine what else happened :-)**

**One more chapter to go, as we return to the Christmas turkey that started the story...**


	5. Christmas Day

**The final chapter. Christmas Dinner. Eleven's final meal before Twelve emerges...**

* * *

"I don't understand what went wrong" a puzzled Clara wondered out loud. "I followed the instructions to the letter, yet the outside of the turkey is overcooked while the inside is a bit raw. I think your TARDIS is trying to sabotage my cooking again."

"No wonder sexy doesn't like you if you keep blaming her for everything. Let's face it, cooking isn't, um, one of your strong points, I can't blame her for trying to hide the kitchen from you."

"You're walking on thin ice chin boy, talking like that to someone with a gravy bowl in her hand! Which will be poured over your head very soon."

"I hasten to add that you have many compensating good points, indeed you are wonderful and perfect in every other aspect, far too wonderful and perfect to waste such nice gravy. And this coat is dry clean only."

"Keep going Doctor" replied Clara with a smile. "Oh, by the way, I'm looking forward to trying your stuffing, with its secret recipe. It'll make a change from the usual boring old sage and onion."

"Ah yes, I have this great recipe, full of amazing ingredients. Breadcrumbs obviously, then exotic herbs from Akhaten, the unique nuts from the Respiro Belt, famous spices only found on the Paralugian Islands and finished off with a generous splash of 100 years old Cognac from Napoleon's private cellar. Unfortunately, the TARDIS store cupboards didn't have any of these ingredients, and the local supermarket had none either, well apart from the breadcrumbs. So I bought a packet of, um sage and onion. Sorry."

"I thought it smelt a bit familiar. Ah well, at least we've got plenty of sprouts. They kept going missing, so I asked the TARDIS if she had any ideas where they'd gone, and hey presto they all reappeared! Indeed, a lot more than I recall buying."

"Traitor!" mumbled the Doctor as he waved his fist towards the TARDIS console when Clara's back was turned. "You know how much I hate them!" The TARDIS made a sniggering noise back.

The Doctor and Clara sat down for Christmas Dinner together, both were determined to make this a happy day, to try and make the most of their remaining time together, and enjoy the moment rather than pining for the future they wouldn't have, at least for this incarnation of the Doctor.

"I wear a Christmas cracker hat now. Christmas cracker hats are cool!" the Doctor exclaimed.

"Agreed chin boy! That's one hat that definitely suits you."

As the meal went on though, the Doctor started flagging and visibly showed signs of deterioration. He played with his pudding – Christmas pudding had always been his favourite part of the meal – and slowly lost his usual bounce. Clara saw this, and knew the end was coming, a moment she had been trying to put out of her mind all day.

"Clara" he weakly spoke, "I don't think I can hold out for much longer. I might have to skip the coffee…"

"Oh Doctor, what a lovely day it's been. Surely you must have a solution, there must be a way of changing things, of rewriting history, a Big Friendly Button."

"I'm sorry Clara, I so wish I could go back, but there are fixed points in time which can't be changed. This body has had a good innings, I mustn't complain, and it's not as if I'll be leaving you completely. There'll be a whole new me to look forward too, someone who wears even cooler bow ties no doubt."

"But he won't be you. I've seen all the Doctors, all the various versions of you, and they've all been inspiring and wonderful in different ways, but you're the Doctor that will always be special to me. You're the Doctor I love. "

And with that Clara ran across to hold the Doctor. They held each what for felt like forever, indeed Clara and the Doctor wished it was forever, but both knew that this Doctor, her Doctor only had moments left.

"Clara I'm afraid the moment has come, you need to get back for your own safety."

Clara reluctantly let go of the Doctor, and retreated a few paces.

"Goodbye Doctor… and good luck" she whimpered, tears streaming down her cheeks.

"Goodbye, my beautiful impossible girl. Geronimo…"

And with that his body starting glowing orange, a burst of energy exploded from his body, and amid screams a new Doctor emerged, then slumped on the floor from the physical exertion. A very different looking Doctor, gone were the boyish features, instead this Doctor was older looking, more mature. Clara looked on, trying to comprehend what had happened. She, of all the Doctor's companions, was well aware of what the process meant, but this didn't mean that she would easily be able to take it in, when the Doctor, her Doctor changed into a stranger.

Regaining her composure, she decided that she needed to be strong, and push aside her sense of loss and longing. But it was hard, so hard, trying to hide her heartbreak, and appear composed outside, when inside she was dying.

"Doctor, are you alright."

"I think so, how do I look?"

"Older than before, grey haired, quite, um distinguished really."

"That'll take some getting used to. I take it that everything is where it should be, as you haven't run off screaming. It's always a worry that the process might go wrong."

"Everything looks to be correct."

"It's Clara isn't it? I guess that you're my companion."

Clara nodded.

"Well hello. I guess it must be a shock for you, as it's certainly somewhat disorientating for me! It always takes a while for everything to work properly, for the memories to all come back, so forgive me if I don't remember everything that happened in the recent past."

"That's ok Doctor, I'm here for you, to help you with whatever assistance you require."

"Thank you."

The Doctor looked around the TARDIS.

"I notice a turkey on the table, is it Christmas Day?"

"Yes, we've just had Christmas Dinner, it was your final, I mean your predecessor's, final meal" replied Clara, desperately trying to fight back the tears.

"Oh that's nice, but a rotten day to regenerate. Hmm, that turkey looks a bit underdone, someone could get Salmonella from eating that. Oh Lord, please tell me I didn't regenerate from food poisoning!"

"I am happy to confirm that wasn't the case" replied Clara regaining her composure. "You died from Garalutian poison, saving a boy's life."

"Well that's a relief, it's always good to know I didn't go out in vain. Was it just us having Christmas Dinner together?"

Clara nodded.

"Hmm, how very domestic, just like a married couple!" the Doctor laughed.

Clara felt the tears coming back.

"Plenty of food left over I see, I'm feeling quite peckish. I'll skip the undercooked turkey; two regenerations in one day would be a bit much I think you'll agree! Lots of those green vegetables though, Brussels sprouts they're called aren't they?"

"Yes, you can't stand them, you said that they're the worse food stuff in the whole universe, and even worse than Trigatorian jumping worms."

"Well there's plenty left over, so a shame for them to go to waste. Let me try one. Mmmm, lovely, they'll fill the gap very nicely. You see Clara, a lot changes when I regenerate, it's not just the physical appearance, much of my personality changes as well. That's what makes the process so simultaneously exciting, and nerve-wracking, as I never know what I'll be like afterwards. I can emerge with completely different tastes and preferences."

"I understand" Clara softly replied." Maybe you'll want some time by yourself now, or someone new to travel with."

"Clara, I may not be the Doctor you knew, but deep down I'm still the same. I cannot recall the exact details of our relationship, but know that you're deeply important to me, someone I completely trust and respect. Once my body has settled down, I'll be itching to go and explore again, and would love you to come with me. What do you say?"

"Doctor, of course I'd love to travel with you" replied a smiling Clara. Her Doctor was gone, but this Doctor was someone she still wanted to travel and spend time with, even if things would never be the same as before.

The Doctor held out his hand, and they shook hands.

"Excellent Clara. But you can do the washing up first, I need a lie down!"

* * *

**That was my version of Eleven's final episode this Christmas. I'm sure it will be emotional, just writing this chapter brought a lump to my throat. ****I tried to make Twelve different from Eleven, more calm and considered, and more formal, but still quite pleasant. And liking Brussels Sprouts :-)**


End file.
